So you feel that your aging parent needs help...but they insist they are fine...who's right and who's wrong?

     If you are having this argument with your parent, you are not the only one.  The truth is you are both right!  When we look at our parents, we notice how their memory is getting worse, how unsteady they are on their feet, how they are getting much slower doing daily things such as dressing and eating.  In their minds, they are still able to do these things so they feel that they do not need help.

     Are you worried about them falling?  Are you worried about them being clean
enough?  Are you worried about if they are eating enough food?  Are you worried that they are getting depressed or alone too much? Are you worried about them driving or going places alone?  These are all common worries of children who have aging parents.

     Many seniors are afraid to admit that even though they are “able” to do the daily things that they are struggling while they are doing them.  Many fear that this is a sign of losing their independence and will need to move to a nursing home.  They want to remain in their own home and keep their independence, and on the other side you love them and want them to remain safe.  This is a very common
debate and there are options where they can keep their independence and still remain safe.  

     Home Care has become very popular and is a great resource to use to respect your parents’ wishes by keeping them in their own home and to reassure your feelings of them being safe. Home care agencies hire and train individuals to care for your parents so they can be safe and remain in their own home.  They help with daily activities such as bathing, grooming, medication reminders, meal prep, shopping, errands, dr. appointments, laundry, house cleaning, companionship and more.  Caregivers can assist while still letting them keep their independence.  For example, you parent is able to give themselves a shower but you notice that they are doing it less and less. 
A common concern is that even though they are able to do it themselves
they are scared of falling.  A caregiver can give them the peace of mind that they need to be there while they are taking a shower.  Does your parent have
laundry piling up?  Even though they are “able” to do it, they may struggle walking with a walker and trying to carry dirty laundry.  Having a Caregiver there can help with laundry.  Even if your parent wants to do it themselves, the caregiver can still assist by carrying the laundry for them to avoid a fall.  The
laundry gets done, your parent remains safe and your parent keeps their independence.  Home care agencies can also provide companionship services to take your parent places, to take them on walks, or just simply play cards with them.  This is a great way to help your parent so they don’t get
depressed.  These are just a few examples of how home care can help and there are 1000 more ways. 

     Home care is a great compromise for both parties.  Caregivers can fully do things that need to be done or just “assist” them so they feel like they are still in control.  This should be clearly stated when signing up with an agency.  You should also make sure that any agency that you choose has background checks done on all of their employees and ongoing training to be assured that each employee knows how to help your family member. The agency should also be state licensed and insured. 

     The most important thing is reassuring your mind so you’re not stressing everyday about their well-being, and at the same time, having your parents feel safe and feel that they still have their self-respect and independence.

     Do you have a question about your aging parent and the best
way to help?  Email us at Hugeheartshomecare@yahoo.com and
we will respond with our best advice!

Written by Jenni Showalter- Owner of Huge Hearts HomeCare in
La Grange, Illinois